All aboard...party of 1

I look back, with my shoes in one hand and my boarding pass in the other, and there she is my mother waving back with watery red eyes and a gleeful smile. I wave back, not being able to control my emotions any further waterworks bursting from my eyes like a broken floodgate. I head to my flight handing the flight agent my boarding pass with shaky hands, ready to start a new adventure...I think.

Let me back up, my name is German Botello. I'm a student in Atlanta, born in Atlanta but raised in Athens, Georgia. I'm the youngest of three children to my Mexican parents, I've played pokemon since I was 5 years old, I love Disney movies with a passion, and up until now I have had my life completely figured out. I recently decided to go abroad. Unlike many who decide on Europe, I chose a different path and headed towards the far west, South Korea to be specific.

This blog serves as my platform to talk about my experiences on what it's like to be a minority student going abroad and my adventures while being abroad.

Like many hispanic kids, I grew up believing I was meant to join the workforce after high school. I was destined to be the prodigy son and take over Dad's concrete business. However, life had a different path for me and thanks to the encouragement from my mom and guidance counselor I decided to go against my dad's wishes and attend college. As you can guess this didn't bode to well with him but after 2 years, numerous awards, scholarships, and clubs it was clear I meant business.

My life was on the right track for success, however something was missing. It wasn't until I was going thru some buzzfeed videos one night when I realized what it was that I was missing. Travel. As awesome as things were, I came to the conclusion that I was seriously lacking some culture and worldly experiences in my life. How can I as a marketing major hope to be marketable when the most I have seen has been around the Atlanta boundaries? I recalled seeing Avatar and the witch doctor saying "it's hard to fill a cup that is already full" well my cup is half empty, and world experiences would be the creme to my coffee.

BUT as determined as I sounded than the time for my departure arrived quicker than I expected. The day before my venture out the country, I spent with my sister who could very well be my twin considering how close we are. Neither of us talking about the subject, just enjoying each others company and distracting ourselves with her baby's cuteness. I found myself wandering aimlessly around the halls of the house checking my luggage time and time again already knowing I have everything packed.

Finally, it was time for bed and my Father called me. I still feel bad for not continuing the family legacy, I didn't do it because I don't love my dad, on the contrary I consider him my idol and hero, the line of work just wasn't for me. Anyways, I pick up the phone and he asks "how are you feeling" I stifled a cry "fine" I mutter. He says to me "You know you don't have to go if you don't want too." I make a joke about the expensive plane ticket "Are you going to reimburse me?" There's an awkward silence, I'm used to these when talking with my dad but this one feels particularly dense, neither of us like showing our emotions. He starts "I love you son, I always have, you make me proud, take care, I can't be there to protect you so be careful, please."

"Curse you" I think to myself, how dare he say everything i've ever wanted to hear the day before I am about to leave the country, how dare he invoke these emotions I have been trying to suppress for so long. "Thank...Thank you, Dad, I love you too. I'll let you know when I arrive" I almost whisper trying not to cry.

We say our goodbyes and I hang up, I take a moment to adjust myself before heading inside to be with my sister and mom. My mom skypes in my Tia Martha aka the badass hilarious aunt who would drive me to my dates and get me the rated M games when I was kid, I hadn't seen her in well over 8 years since she went back to Mexico to be with family. Tia Martha tells me not to come back with any Korean babies or baby mamas.

It's 10p.m. and we are heading to bed. My mom leaves me alone with my sister, we stand there in silence for a moment. She asks "how are you feeling" "Fine" I say with a smile. "How are you feeling German" she says again. I can't hide anything from my twin. I bear hug her and begin to ball like her baby son, letting all the emotions I have been holding wash over me. She says this to me. "It's okay munchkin, I know you're crying because you're scared, I'm going to miss you too. But you're going to be okay because you're smart, you're independent and resourceful, you're the only one us that has the strength to do this" I continue to cry into her shoulder for a few moments, thanking her for the kind words and I go to bed laying awake, restless.

I get about 4 hours of sleep before my alarm goes off. My mom is taking me to the airport, as much as I'd like her not too since it's a 6am flight and I have to be at the airport at 4am but she's a Hispanic mom so there's no saying no. She's always been my driver, whether it was taking me to early mom cross country practices, scholarship interviews in Atlanta from our Athens, or college tours, my mom was always down to take me the distance. We sit in the car listening to 105.3 El Patron making jokes about our silly family and how the family ranch was doing. She recalls a story from a long time ago. She starts "You remember Pre-K?" I say "I remember dating girls for their crayons." She smacks my head "Always a flirt, no not that. Do you remember your first day?" "Not really" I say. She states "Your dad told me you were too young for school that I should wait a year, but I was home with you I knew you were bored and needed something else. I walked you right up to your classroom and just turned right around waved and said "bye Mommy." Can you believe that? A four year told telling his mom goodbye, I knew you were different from your siblings in that moment. You're independent and know what you wanted and did everything to achieve it."

I sit there in the car,  in awe not believing what I just heard, we arrive at the airport and mom helps me check in, putting the luggage tags on my backpack like she's making sure her son has his shirt folded in. We wait in the security line together, I stay hugging her, but the time has arrived that I have to let her go. I give her one last hug and kiss, not daring to look at her eyes for fear of my tears and I trudge thru security.

I look back, with my shoes in one hand and my boarding pass in the other, and there she is my mother waving back with watery red eyes and a gleeful smile. I wave back, not being able to control my emotions any further waterworks bursting from my eyes like a broken floodgate. I head to my flight handing the flight agent my boarding pass with shaky hands, ready to start a new adventure...I think.